Two months ago, a San Antonio mother of three was physically assaulted by her partner of more than 15 years. It took her two times to call 9-1-1; hesitant, she realized that day wouldn’t be the last time he would hit her.
Throughout the relationship, she had lost count of the times she thought about leaving because of emotional and verbal abuse, but she finally left when it became physical.
We refer to her as “J.” in this story upon her request in an effort to protect her from possible retaliation. Her assailant and ex-partner was her high school sweetheart.
After her partner was arrested, Bexar County’s Safety Team Active Response (STAR) program created a safety plan for her and got her to the Family Violence Prevention Center’s Battered Women and Children’s Shelter before a bond could be posted.
The STAR program is a domestic violence navigation line that started as a joint effort between the City of San Antonio and Bexar County in 2021. But when funding for the program ended in 2023, it relaunched in April 2024 and moved to Bexar County.
The STAR program now primarily serves people living in unincorporated areas of Bexar County, but helps connect anyone seeking help to resources and agencies available. It connects survivors of domestic violence who call 9-1-1 directly to case managers who can help them plan to escape unsafe situations within 24 hours.
Deputies who respond to domestic or family violence calls contact the Southwest Texas Regional Advisory Council or STRAC, which calls the survivor to do an assessment to determine their risk of being killed by a romantic partner or family member.
High risk survivors get help immediately, and at-risk survivors get help within 24 hours.
Results of that assessment go to one of 10 county crisis case managers who are on call 24 hours a day, each of whom handle an average case load of 30 to 35.
J. described being in a state of shock, still processing what had happened, while answering the questions over the phone. She was labeled at risk.
It meant she would need to wait 24 hours to get help, but because she had been assaulted on a Friday she would have had to wait until Monday. But after several calls to the shelter and to Metro Health’s Violence Prevention office, the county and city worked together to get J. into the shelter as soon as possible.
She moved out of the shelter with her children in early November. The family’s pets, who had been staying at the Bexar County Animal Facility, are now with the family.
Since its launch in July, the program has assisted people in Bexar County 1,108 times — 1,038 of those are all different survivors who sought help.
Of the people who have sought help from the domestic violence navigation line, 42% report being choked or strangled, and 28% of them report their abusers have threatened to kill them.
More troubling statistics: 75% reported domestic violence has happened to them before, but only 11% reported that law enforcement got involved in those situations.
County data shows that 75% of survivors have at least one child.
“Even though these are crimes of escalation, sometimes even when they get really bad, people are still not talking,” said Andrea Guerrero-Guajardo, director of the county’s health department, at an Oct. 7 press conference. “We like to say it’s a success story when a victim finally leaves their abuser, but what we say is that it’s a success story every time a person calls for help.”
Domestic violence accounted for half of Bexar County’s murders in 2024.
Hours after Bexar County leaders addressed growing trends in domestic violence, Olmos Park real estate agent and mother of four Suzanne Clark Simpson was reported missing.
A press conference the following day would inform the world that neighbors saw her involved in a physical altercation with her husband of 22 years and the neighbor didn’t report it. Simpson’s husband has been charged with her murder.
“The main thing that’s hampering our efforts is that this is a crime that occurs in the shadows. We don’t know about it many times until it’s too late,” said Bexar County Sheriff Javier Salazar, who in his re-election said reducing San Antonio’s domestic violence homicides was among his top priorities.
“This is not an issue that goes away. It doesn’t fix itself. Abusers don’t stop being abusers. It’s a crime that needs to be reported,” he said.
The navigation line program faced criticism from the Bexar County Commissioners Court for ending its joint effort with the city and for breaking off into a county effort while the city continues its own initiative.
Deputy City Manager Maria Villagomez said the program had to move to the county because of a CDC grant that ended, and that the plan was always to expand the navigation line to become a county initiative.
A trajectory changed
J., 33, said the details of that day are still a blur, but she’ll never forget how her partner backhanded her, grabbed her hair, and hit the side of her head. She heard a ringing in her ear and her right eye was bruised.
Her partner was arrested on charges of family violence, but she knew he would post bail immediately, so she needed to hide with her children somewhere he couldn’t reach her.
“I just thought — my kids — I [didn’t] want him to take the keys,” she said. “I just didn’t want him to get to the kids or try to take them, because he’s threatened to take them in the past.”
“I felt bad. I’d never done anything like that, like a big step toward him. I’ve never gone against him … I was just like, I’m finally done,” she said.
At the shelter, advocates and case managers continue to assist her in filing a protective order and for full custody of her children, and they’re all getting counseling services.
“I had some family members I could have gone to, but he would’ve gone to go look for me then,” she said. “If I was at a family members’ [home], it would have been easier to go right back.”
J. later found out that the reason her partner had been aggressive and irritable was due to his struggle with drug addiction, which she didn’t know had been happening for several years. When the abuse got worse, he had increased his drug use, she said.
CEO of Family Violence Prevention Services Inc. Marta Peláez said knowing there are resources is one thing, but taking action and leaving is harder.
“The number of people that receive information of resources available can be large, but the actual number of people that make that important phone call to the shelter [or to 9-1-1], is a fraction. That’s the reality,” she said.
The Family Violence Prevention Services Inc. recently expanded a survey that tracks the prevalence of the teen dating violence among teens. It started at one North Side high school, but was shared across several school districts in Bexar County.
“The most important opportunity that we have to reduce domestic violence is with the next generation. If we want to break the cycle and reduce the incidents of domestic violence in our community one day, we have to make special efforts to educate the children [and] teens,” she said.
According to the Bexar County Sheriff’s Office, aggravated family violence arrests have increased exponentially over the past two years. Each year in San Antonio, there are roughly 40,000 family violence-related calls to SAPD. The number of domestic violence homicides in Bexar County doubled from four in 2023 to at least nine so far in 2024.
Still, family violence case dismissals are at 80% in Bexar County.
“We will continue to use all efforts to hold abusers accountable, even when victims cannot be present,” said Bexar County District Attorney Joe Gonzales at the Oct. 7 press conference.
But there are still gaps that exist in escaping domestic violence situations in San Antonio. Like J, too many people are forced to make several calls to get into the Battered Women’s and Children’s Shelter, Peláez said.
Services should be delivered immediately, she said, because the courage the victim has to finally make that phone call to leave, as well as that opportunity they may have to leave, may happen only once.
“If they doesn’t receive appropriate, immediate help, that opportunity will be lost,” Peláez said.
If you witness domestic violence, call Crime Stoppers at 210-335-6000.
Call 9-1-1 if immediate help is needed.
